It's been 15 years since the previous page, and I'm still living in Pensacola.
I am just now, in 2020, coming to deal with the obsessive compulsive thoughts and accusations that frequently try to cloud my mind.
I can't believe it's taken me so long to find the courage to deal with this issue, but it has. There are medicines that I am looking into taking, and will be able to report later as to their impact.
All these years, I have been writing and recording privately in my studio. I have, however, abandoned the music industry, or they have abandoned me. I think it has been actually a little of both.
My heart is sometimes broken, as I reflect on my life, then, at other times, I feel it swell up with pride at my accomplishments.
I'm not sure how to look at the past, perhaps with two pairs of glasses...
The first pair would reveal a "me" starting over, without the mental issues and the spiritual conflicts.
I would be someone less challenging to be around, steady in my moods and behavior, and someone far more sensible around those precious folks, gifted and called to help me. I would have clarity of mind and spiritual direction.
The second pair of glasses would reveal a "me" looking on the past simply, the way it is, and the way it was.
I am a success and a failure. I have made it, and I have blown it.
I hope to be passionate again to do great and challenging things. Right now, I don't have goals. I am happy with peace.